This Fuckin' Life...

Honestly, I don't know why I have to be in this situation. Damn it! I've been trying Soooooooooo hard to be patient in life. It's true when they say that as you grow older,things get more complicated.

July 2002, when I learned that my Dad had lung cancer, I felt like as if a big fat ass woman was sittin' on my chest. I couldn't breathe... The feeling was so new but in a tremendous depressing state. Plus my partner broke up with me at that same day. My work was affected up to the point that I had to leave it. Was just thankful for my friends, especially my bestfriend Faye and this person whom I just met through the internet. My friends stayed with me when I had to cry. They let me feel that I still can get my source of strength from them.

This person I met in the internet was someone I never expected to be part of this damn life. In fairness, she helped me a lot! She is the only person who made me realize that it's not really the end of everything or this is not the worst because her dad died in an instant when she was 18..the cause.. heart attack, and i can say it was definitely harder for her. But just hearing her talk and whenever we chat and converse bout life, it gives me hope and i'm happy bout the fact that even if my Dad's really getting worse everyday... at least I have that chance each day to make it up for him and make him feel the I love hime so much. Gurl (you know who you are) just wana say thank you really for being there.. Thanks for believing in me.. thanks for giving me hope.. I owe u a lot! I promise to make it up to you once I get the chance to go there in LA.

And to all my other hommies' I really appreciate you guys for listening with my crap... the things you do for me... I may not say it but it's such a big thing... THANK YOU!